A COMIC FEUD

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A comic feud

Two great stars put on an act to thrill their fans

The first film that I saw in the popular `Road Series' was "Road to Utopia". It featured two of the greatest stars of Hollywood, Bing Crosby and Bob Hope, and also the glamour girl, Dorothy Lamour. Later I managed to see all the other Road pictures. They were delightful films full of wit, fun and music.

Bing Crosby was one of the greatest singers of all time. His rich baritone enthralled several generations of listeners. His discs sold over 300 million copies or more in the 1940's. And one of them, "White Christmas", was the biggest seller of the twentieth century. Soldiers encamped far away from home during Christmas, listened to Crosby's soulful masterpiece with nostalgia and high emotion. Crosby was also a good actor, and won two Oscars. He was atop of the popularity polls for over a couple of decades.

Bob Hope was a comedian noted for his deadpan delivery of lines. He was also a compere of shows like the Oscar Awards ceremony. He entertained the troops during World War II, and the wars in Korea and Vietnam.

The road pictures

Both these actors were under contract to Paramount Pictures, and the studio decided to pair them in a series. And thus came about the Road Series. The films in this series had a simple formula - the pursuit of Dorothy Lamour by our two heroes. This happened on trips to faraway places like Hong Kong, Zanzibar, Singapore and so on. Both the men tried to hoodwink each other and win the heart of Lamour.

And there were witty exchanges and songs with funny lines. In "Road to Morocco" there is a song that goes: "Like Webster's Dictionary we are morocco bound". Both the stars also had their own starring films, which were big hits too.

Most of the Road films were good clean fun, though occasionally some scenes bordered on the risqué. In "Road to Utopia" the three are travelling in the snow for days together. Bob Hope pursues Dorothy Lamour romantically while Lamour pursues Bing Crosby with equal fervour. There is a snow drift and suddenly a deep chasm forms, with Hope and Lamour on one side and Crosby on the other. Since the chasm cannot be crossed, they decide to go their ways and meet some time in the future. Sure enough Crosby as an old man visits the old couple Hope and Lamour. After some pleasant reminiscing Crosby asks them whether they have any children, and they tell him they have a son. Lamour calls her son, who comes down the stairs. And surprise! It is a young Bing Crosby.

A battle of wits

The rivalry between the two characters in the Road films gave them the idea of feuding in real life. This was of course a mock feud, which tickled their fans no end. Actually the two were good friends.

Both were ardent golfers, and owned large golf courses. In Bing Crosby's golf course a huge board was put up at the entrance - "Abandon HOPE all ye who enter here."

Occasionally Paramount Pictures lent their stars out to other producers. Samuel Goldwyn borrowed Bob Hope for his film, "The Princess and the Pirate". In the last scene, the princess comes cooing towards Bob Hope who stands waiting for her with a smirk on his face.

But she goes past him, and a man from the crowd steps out, and she flies into his arms. The man is Bing Crosby in an unannounced single shot guest appearance. Hope gives the audience an aggrieved look. "She has thrown me over for a bit player from Paramount" he says ruefully.

Bing Crosby passed away in 1977 at the age of 74. Bob Hope continued to win many honours including a knighthood. He completed his hundredth year in 2003. He died a few months after grandly celebrating his centenary.

J.VASANTHAN

© Copyright 2000 - 2009 The Hindu

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DOROTHY PARKER

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Remembering a witty writer

I first came to know about Dorothy Parker when I went to study in Madras Christian College. Four or five students there were avid admirers of the witty lady’s writings.

They introduced me to a line which seemed to amuse them no end. “Men seldom make passes / at girls who wear glasses.” I found that in our college some girls who wore glasses were very popular with the boys. The college heart-throb was a girl called Sumitra who wore square glasses with a thin black frame.

Anyway I started reading Dorothy Parker’s writings which were found in anthologies available at the USIS library. Her output had been very meagre, but this slender contribution had won her fame and respect among top writers and critics of the day. She and a few other writers met regularly in the Algonquin Hotel (New York) for dinner. This group came to be known as the Algonquin Club and they were quoted in chat columns of the day frequently. The bon mots and one-liners of this group became well known all over America and perhaps the English-speaking world.

Put-downs

Dorothy Parker particularly excelled in the put-down, a remark meant to make fun of someone. Talking about a society lady she said: “She is always very nice to her inferiors – whenever she can find them.” As you can see the sting is in the tail, a characteristic of all Dorothy Parker remarks.

Talking about a very popular writer of the day, she said, “Somerset Maugham – that old lady is a crashing bore.” This remark was not in reference to his writing but about his social behaviour. And about a much married and divorced socialite: “She broke a leg while visiting London, probably sliding down a barrister.”

President Calvin Coolidge was a man of few words. He also slept a good deal, by day as well as night and was the reverse of animated. When he died after completing his term of office, Dorothy Parker on being told of his death asked “How can they tell?”

A glamorous Hollywood actress and Dorothy Parker happened to come to the door of a Hall at the same time. The actress gestured to Ms. Parker to precede her, saying “Age before beauty”. Dorothy Parker tossed her head disdainfully and walked ahead saying, “Pearls before swine”.

Fun till the last

One of the leading columns in America at that time was Franklin P.Adams’ “The Conning Tower”. This column gave a lot of importance to puns and wit, especially the wisecrack. And so this column quoted Dorothy Parker quite often. Every year Mr.Adams gave a dinner to all people featured in his column and presented a gold watch to the one who had been quoted most often. Needless to say, Dorothy Parker won the watch with ease. And everywhere the talk was about “Did you hear what Dorothy Parker said today?” Inevitably things she never said were attributed to her.

She spoke deprecatingly about herself but always with humour. “I don’t care what is written about me so long as it isn’t true.” And then about her love life: “I require only three things in a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.” “It takes a lot of experience for a girl to kiss like a beginner.”

Though she made others laugh Ms. Parker wasn’t fully satisfied with her life. She thought of suicide, but fortunately her sense of humour swamped this thought. This is what she wrote about suicide:

“Razors pain you; Rivers are damp;

Acids stain you; And drugs cause cramp.

Guns aren’t lawful; Nooses give;

Gas smells awful; You might as well live.”

She lived to a ripe old age splitting the sides of the world with laughter.

J.VASANTHAN (e-mail: jvasanthan@sancharnet.in)

© Copyright 2000 - 2009 The Hindu

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"ROPE' STRETCHES SUSPENSE

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A Hitchcock film based on a real-life incident

A friend recently lent me a few DVDs, mostly of old Hollywood films. One of these, ‘Rope’, a Hitchcock film was as thrilling now as when I first saw it in 1950. This film was based on a play by Patrick Hamilton.

Hamilton’s play was put up by me on behalf of Curtain Club at the American College Auditorium, and was quite a success. M. Lawrence of the Department of English, who was at that time a student played the role made famous by James Stewart. Ravindran Solomon, Daniel David and David Bloom were some of the other actors in our production.

Aiming for a perfect crime

The story of ‘Rope’ was based on a real-life murder that shocked the world. Two young men, Nathan Leopold and Richard Loeb killed a fourteen year old boy, Bobby Franks in 1924. It was a murder without any motive except the desire to commit the perfect crime.

The murderers were brilliant young men. Loeb was the youngest graduate ever of the University of Michigan. He was nineteen years old at the time of the murder. Leopold was a student of law. He was also passionately interested in ornithology. Even at the age of twenty he was the leading authority on the Kirkland Warbler, an endangered song bird. Both the young men were avid readers of the works of Nietzsche. They were fascinated by the German philosopher’s theory that the superman should be able to rise above the restrictive morality of ordinary men - he should rise above good and evil.

Unfortunately for young Bobby Franks, Leopold and Loeb chose to put into practice this theory. Thus murder should be an intellectual exercise beyond good and evil. And so Bobby died. The trial of the murderous duo turned out to be a global sensation mainly because of the flamboyant Clarence Darrow’s arguments for the defence. In his usual impressive style he presented an appeal for rehabilitative rather than retributive punishment. Leopold and Loeb received life sentences. Loeb was killed by a fellow prisoner in 1936. Leopold died after his release in 1971.

In the play and the film, ‘Rope’ the victim and the killers were made a little older. The two men strangle their victim and put the body inside a large box used for storing things. Then a few people, including the fiancée of the dead man, are invited for dinner. The dishes are arranged on this box. The suspense is whether the guests will see the body. The housekeeper going back and forth clearing the dishes adds to the nail-biting suspense. James Stewart, Farley Granger and John Dall were the main players. Stewart is the one who discovers the murder and brings Granger and Dall to book.

Technical wizardry

Hitchcock’s film is a stark presentation sans frills in which he experimented with the format and the setting. There is no background music except towards the very end of the film. The quietness thus caused enhanced the effect of the tense suspense.

It is generally agreed that one of the great advantages of the film medium is the editing. One can cut and paste to create effects. But Hitchcock decided to do away with editing, and the whole film was shot at one stretch. The camera moved to a close-up of someone’s back. Then the reel was changed, and the movement started from that close-up. The time taken for the actual shooting was the same as that of the duration of the film.

The whole film was shot inside a room. It was a tradition in Hitchcock’s films that he would make a brief appearance. So one wondered how he would do that since the camera never left the room. And then through an open window you see a hoarding advertising a slimming drug. The plump Hitchcock is there in the advertisement illustrating perhaps the ‘before’ stage.

The film is one of Hitchcock’s more innovative thrillers.

J.VASANTHAN (e-mail: jvasanthan@sancharnet.in )

© Copyright 2000 - 2009 The Hindu

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COPS & THE CAPTAIN - AN ARMY OFFICER'S UNUSUAL HOBBY

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Cops and the captain

Down Memory Lane

An army officer’s unusual hobby


My uncle Balraj had been a captain in the British army, and had seen action in Burma during World War II. After the end of the war and his retirement from the army he settled down in England where he got a highly remunerative job. He visited us once in two years, and his visits were looked forward to since he was an entertaining talker and a jolly person.

An entertainer

He was dark and plump, but very well dressed. He was a pipe smoker, and whether the pipe was lit or not, it dangled forever from one corner of his mouth. His friends called him by his initials, JSB. The boys and girls from the neighbouring houses gathered in our place when JSB came on a visit. He regaled them with stories of the war which he told in a lively rollicking style.

JSB had a rather unusual hobby. He was an avid student of the origins and developments of language. He gave us fascinating accounts of how some words came into being, and how their meanings changed during the course of time. Most of what he said has been forgotten, but the story of some words stuck in my mind.
Origin of ‘cops’

One such word was ‘cop’. We now use the word to refer to a policeman, but without knowing how the word came into being. It is supposed to be derived from the old English verb to cop, meaning to catch, or get hold of. A policeman is also referred to as ‘copper’, that is one who cops or catches offenders. “Mind you, he may be a copper, but that doesn’t make him a mean metal” said JSB with a chuckle. “And when you write cops, make sure not to add an ‘e’. That would make them woods”

There is another theory too about the origin of ‘cop’. In 1829, Sir. Robert Peel organised the first police force in London. Members of Peel’s force were dressed in blue uniforms with large copper buttons. These conspicuous copper buttons it is said gave the name coppers to the police. This was later shortened to ‘cop’. London policemen were sometimes called ‘peelers’ or ‘bobbies’ after Sir.Robert Peel, who was affectionately known as ‘Bobbie Peel’.

JSB gave us many such accounts about various words, always interlaced with boisterous humour and guffaws. We were enthralled by his witty exposition of the origin of words. He passed away in his nineties about fifteen years ago.

J.VASANTHAN

© Copyright 2000 - 2009 The Hindu


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